Sunshine & Chocolate & Everything Writing

Writing as if I have something to say.

500 words on love – continued

Posted by Line Larsen on September 14, 2008

You can read the first part of this entry here.

There’s always a beginning.

Did it open with our first kiss, when you had your arm around me and I leaned back to press my lips against yours? Did it open with our first goodbye, one of many, which left me in tears and wanting to run after you half way through Europe? No. It must have started before that.

In theory, you can say it all started with those tiny little coincidences that had to fall in place one by one and eventually lead me to you. But the love; it must have begun somewhere.

Maybe it led off from the first time you made me laugh. Or possibly, the first time you made me angry. You used to take such pleasure in infuriating me, feeling each time I thought about you, in fondness or annoyance, was one step closer to your goal of being with me.

You are the first one who has ever found me worthy of fighting for. There has been those who wanted my time and attention before you, but no one ever tried as hard as you. I went from being irritated, to intrigued, to infatuated, to being madly and love. All according to your plan, you say. I was worth all of that? Really? You say I was, you say you still think so.

I wouldn’t know how to describe you, there’s just so much to you. You say I have layers, but you have angles. You see the world from ten different points of view all at once. Nobody has ever forced me to think and feel as much as you do. You’ve made me cry numerous times, but even more often you’ve made me stop crying. I’ve screamed at you until I was out of breath and out of voice. I’ve laughed until I couldn’t breathe. Every day you challenge me, question me, poke at me. And every day, without a break, you love me for me.

An unkind soul once said to me that every time someone opened their mouth to speak, I looked at them in a way that made them think: “Oh no… This better be interesting.” It was true, unfortunately. No one ever takes to me initially. You, however, have a kindness about you. When someone speaks, you lean in and listen. People feel good about themselves when they’re around you, most of all me. If you should leave me today, I would be left as a stronger and more confident person. A better mother, a better writer and a better partner to whoever comes after you.

So where did all this love begin?

It begun with you. Simple as that.

Your jokes, your encouragement, your kindness, your provoking opinions, your promises, your compliments, your comforting voice, your soft kiss and eventually your strong belief that we are good together. And every day you trip me up and make me fall for you a little bit more.

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